Rest is Resistance

 Thursday, January 5, 2023- Friday, January 6, 2023

Today is the 83rd day of school. There are 180 days in a school year, so we are not quite at halfway yet, but almost. People have been asking me what I've been doing on my sabbatical. I respond with:

• some traveling: New Zealand, Australia, Mexico, SoCal
• taking elders to appointments
• spending time with parents
• creating arts and crafts: crochet, paint, card making, cooking
• a lot of nothing

Why do I say that I do a lot of nothing? Because I am. Someone encouraged me in October to "do nothing"  and "to rest." They said that we are always on the go, that life is full of busyness, so why not rest?  

There are days that I don't follow a check list of things to do. Days when others may perceive my day to be "unproductive."  I am learning to be okay with this. I am okay with resting. Sometimes I feel the creeping of the feeling of what am I doing during my sabbatical? What am I accomplishing? Well, the purpose of the sabbatical is for me to rest, rejuvenate, focus on myself. Resting and doing nothing fills my physical and mental being. Not rushing around gives me space to rest, be creative, and think clearly. 

I just finished the podcast by Glennon Doyle: We Can Do Hard Things (October 13, 2022)- No More Grind: How to Finally Rest with Tricia Hersey. Tricia wrote the book Rest is Resistance: A Manifesto. 

I haven't read the book, but oh, the content of this book was so enlightening. Some of my big nugget take aways from the podcast/content:

• we are programmed to over work and be productive, beyond exhaustion
• rest does not mean to be lazy or unproductive
• the concept of "grind" and overworking stems from white supremacy culture of perfectionism, capitalism, and producing
• go slow, be intentional about going slow to make changes around rest and work
• Understand that "urgency" is part of the system that gets us to not think clearly about our work and the oppression that happens

I encourage you to listen to the podcast. I think Victor has the book, so I'll thumb through it. 

I was raised to be industrious and productive. With both my parents being immigrants and having little coming to the US, they did worked and labored hard and for many hours a day. Mom was a teacher's aide going between two schools and dad had two jobs as a courier for Bank of American and a banquet waiter for Holiday Inn. They instilled in my siblings and me to work hard and we understood that results/rewards would come. Mom also taught us how to do chores and said things to me like: "If you don't know how to clean the house, on one is going to marry you." Well, I did find a partner despite my abilities to keep the house spotless! 

I have been questioned by mom about not being industrious/productive. 

Mom: what did you do today?

Me: not much

Mom: Really? Do you want me to come and help you clean the house?

I think my mom is programmed to be productive and to be unproductive may be perceived as being lazy. Well, I'm not lazy, but I do know that I need rest. 

I think there's much more conversation to be had on this topic. That's all I have for now. As Tricia Hersey said, this work takes time. I finish this blog with some quotes from Rest is Resistance: A Manifesto. What do you think?

“Productivity should not look like exhaustion. The concept of laziness is a tool of the oppressor. A large part of your unraveling from capitalism will include becoming less attached to the idea of productivity and more committed to the idea of rest as a portal to just be.”

“You were not just born to center your entire existence on work and labor. You were born to heal, to grow, to be of service to yourself and community, to practice, to experiment, to create, to have space, to dream, and to connect.”

“Loving ourselves and each other deepens our disruption of the dominant systems. They want us unwell, fearful, exhausted, and without deep self-love because you are easier to manipulate when you are distracted by what is not real or true.”

“One day I hope we can all deprogram from the lie that rest, silence, and pausing is a luxury and privilege. It is not! The systems manipulated you to believe it is true. The systems have been lying and guiding us all blindly to urgent and unsustainable fantasies. We have replaced our inherent self-esteem with toxic productivity.”

“It can be easier to believe resting is simply about retiring to your bed when you are tired instead of beginning the messy process of deconstructing your own beliefs and behaviors that are aligned with white supremacy and capitalism. You must be committed to studying how training under the abusive teachings of dominant culture has you bound and limited. This is healing work. This is justice work. When we are aligned against the ideas of the oppressive culture, we understand we didn’t arrive on Earth to be a tool for a capitalist system.”

“Grind culture is violence and violence creates trauma. We have been traumatized deeply.”

“We must believe we are worthy of rest. We don’t have to earn it. It is our birthright. It is one of our most ancient and primal needs.”